I not only don't want to be late for the trailers, I don't want to be late for the adverts. Movie magic....   (read more)

Watching Hangover Part 2 on a Saturday, staying in drinking Coronas and cooking full English breakfast. Would be really churlish to complain. New song totally worth the price of admission alone....   (read more)

"Routine, repetition, tedium, monotony, ephemeracy, inconsequence, abstraction, disorder, boredom, angst, ennui - these are the true hero's enemies, and make no mistake, they are fearsome indeed. For they are real." - David Foster Wallace, The Pale King...   (read more)

It was when I was looking at a PDF which recounts in horrifying detail, with body diagrams and a lot of Chinese, the 108 acu-points/acupunture cavities on the human body that when struck can result in "pain, numbness, unconsciousness, internal organ damage and/or death." And that's when it hit me: if anybody saw my browsing history, they'd probably call MI6 or the FBI on the red phone, and/or run screaming....   (read more)

That's life, that's what all the people say...   (read more)

I don't want to see your underpants. I do not want to hear your music. I do not want to listen to one half of your worthless, jabbering mobile phone conversation....   (read more)

It's over; it's official. I have identified the coolest thing ever. The floor is closed for nominations. Here it is. Hang on to yourself....   (read more)

Most wild animals will only attack you if you directly threaten them or their children. But polar bears will track humans down and take a week to do it....   (read more)

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No. Natalie Portman is still an Israeli-American Ivy League graduate who speaks four (and a bit) languages (including Hebrew and Japanese)...   (read more)

Is there really any need for Shia Labeouf? Would we, perhaps, be better off without Shia Labeouf?...   (read more)

George will know, though Noel probably doesn't, that I probably played more Rolling Thunder than God. And I was good. I seem to recall that I got to the point where I could get through all ten screens on a single quarter. However - I never beat the motherfraker....   (read more)

"The world has agreed to shuffle papers between 9:00AM and 5:00PM, and since you're trapped in the office for that period of servitude, you are compelled to create activities to fill that time....   (read more)

I got such a good reaction to the GI Joe PSAs - well, if you can consider comments in the form of "about to get fired due to laughing my ass off at work" to be good - that I'm providing two addenda....   (read more)

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XKCD is the best web comic in the universe - most especially if you're a computer geek, or a math geek, or a romance geek. It's also the most bizarre....   (read more)

I'm finally going to fulfill my pledge of publishing nothing but Non-Stop Fun! for five days, perhaps in a row....   (read more)

Well, it's that time of year. I'd say the gardeners of Hyde Park must have planted the bulbs, the special bulbs, around March. You know the ones I mean. The ones that sprout blooming flowers on these warm days. Young, shapely, beautiful, nearly completely naked women - wearing only the equivalent of string underpants - lying on their stomachs, all over the grass fields of the park....   (read more)

43 Actual Names Of Royal Navy Battleships That Very Plainly Suggest You Should Not Fuck With The Royal Navy, And 10 That, Kind Of Confusingly, Do Not : Victory, Revenge, Defiance, Warspite, Lion, Two Lions...   (read more)

These are my slippies. I bought them at Wal-Mart. For US$7.50. Verily, America is the land where you can buy anything, anywhere, at any time, for nothing....   (read more)

"The wing of melancholia flicks at me today, perhaps because I have learnt nothing new here, perhaps because of my bad night, perhaps because of my dreams." - Graham Greene, Congo journal...   (read more)

"'I have done that,' says my memory. 'I cannot have done that' - says my pride, and remains adamant. At last - memory yields."...   (read more)

From the New York Times: On Saturday night, attending a dinner with leaders from the Asia-Pacific Economic Cooperation summit, Mr. Bush had to wade into a group of security agents to pull his lead Secret Service agent out of a shoving match with the Chilean police....   (read more)

Evening in SW London. Dim. It's raining! I go to the ceiling-scraping window that opens onto the inner courtyard. "Super-fantastic," I say aloud. I love the London rain....   (read more)

Heart is so full, and evening is mostly clear, and so I head out toward Chelsea, laptop on back - preparing to "kick it old school". That is to say, I'm going to find a congenial pub, treat myself to a pint (and possibly a half), and dispatch with great abandon....   (read more)

Did I mention my resolution to read only English novelists while I'm here? Luckily, England's produced one or two decent ones. ;^) I actually broke down once, which event I memorialized in this poem:...   (read more)

I planted a garden - my first (without close supervision). Tomatoes. Turning soil is, of course, good for the soul....   (read more)

Dateline: Spartanburg-ish, South Carolina, "Quality Hotel" [sic] FACTOID: The state of North Carolina built its Vietnam War Veterans Memorial as part of one of its Interstate Highway 85 South rest stops....   (read more)